Lights, Camera, Sushi!

"I was, but everybody loves the characters who die. I'm just the lucky guy who get's to pick up the pieces." Yuuki was referring to the end of the movie, one that he wasn't sure Kanon had seen yet. "I'm here to try and cheer you up, I don't know what's going through Miku's head, his thought process has always been odd. I can't honestly think you'd do anything wrong..."

Yuuki sipped at his water and munched on his sushi, "So tell me... would you like to get back at Miku at all? I mean, he lied and betrayed you, and the paparazzi aren't interested in me..." He wanted to get back at Miku, he knew the other blonde still had strong feelings for Kanon, it would be a double blow.

Kanon's frown darkened."No. He may have betrayed me and lied but I will not do the same. He knows what he's ruining...what he's losing. I will not get back at him by sleeping with the one person he considers his best friend. Look, I think you're great Yuuki but I...I can't. I couldn't do that to Miku. It would destroy your friendship...and I wouldn't be able to live with the guilt. It's hard enough to live with the reality I've been dumped because someone got famous. Again. Let me know when you're done, k? I'm going to close up early. It doesn't seem likely that anyone will come by." That's how Kanon left it. He may have been hurt deeply by Miku but he wouldn't do something like that to hurt him. He couldn't.

The days passed and his business had barely picked back up. Miku was still ignoring him...he wouldn't even give excuses anymore, just an 'I can't come over' or a 'I'm busy.' So eventually Kanon stopped trying. They were done...it took a bit but he eventually broke down in his restaurant one day. The man didn't hear the bell ring telling him he had a customer nor hear the footsteps of someone walking to him. He did however feel someone take hold of him and pull him to their chest.

"Shh...shh...I got you." Shinya. Of course. He'd come back from tour.

"Shin? What's wrong? You aren't one to cry...never have been." Daisuke had grown up next door to Shinya and Kanon. He didn't really know what to think of seeing the younger brother crying.

"What happened?"

"Miku. It's Toshiya all over again...dammit." Said bassist was standing there with the rest of the band. It wasn't just Dai. Toshiya however didn't seem that concerned of his name being used. He was more worried about Kanon.

"Kanon...what'd the guy do?"

"Dumped me. Not in the nice way you did either. He just...stopped. He ignored me, wouldn't take my calls or return my texts. He stopped coming over. He even goes to another sushi place now. It doesn't help that the stupid paparazzi found out about me and drove away nearly all my customers. I don't know what I'm going to do. The real kicker is all this happened after I realized I love the guy. I never even got a chance to tell him." Shinya pulled his brother to him again. This wasn't good at all. Though no one told Toshiya, it took a long time for Kanon to finally move past it. He'd spent a lot of nights crying over the bassist and the blonde knew it would be worse this time around. Kanon hadn't been in love with Toshiya.

Miku was having the very same breakdown in the privacy of his own home. Now he didn't even have the thirty seconds of Kanon's voice, or the sushi bar he loved so much, or any of the things that made him happy to be alive. Despite being overly successful, he felt like he had nothing.

Persistant knocking finally brought him back to the real world, he tried to clear away the tears, but he knew he'd look like shit no matter what. When he opened the door, some guy he didn't even know pushed in, "Hey! What do you think you're doing?!"

"Is your name Miku?" "Yes--" "Do you have any idea what you're pushing away? What this is doing to Kanon? To hell with your fame or image, you're killing him!"

Suddenly Miku knew, Shinya would have been back from tour by now, along with the rest of the band members, "This isn't about me. It's about him! The paparazzi will never leave him alone, he'll lose everything if I keep going around him! I can't do that to him!" Miku genuinely wasn't worried about himself but Kanon... He would have done anything to keep his life normal...

Toshiya's face hardened. He found from Shinya where this Miku lived and went to have a chat with him. He had to know what he was doing to the chef. The guy looked less then presentable too...good. The man should feel guilty. Now he just had to convince him to stop the dodging.

"I made that same mistake. Don't let him slip away. By the time I finally talked myself into trying again with him, he had moved on. It took me a long time to realize how much I really cared about him. Kanon's one of the best people you could hope to have. He doesn't care about fame or what monsters are out there waiting for those in the limelight. As long as he can have you at the end of the day then he'll be alright. I at least had the decency to tell him it was over instead of breaking his heart by avoiding him at all costs. The sad thing is you don't even know how lucky you are. Kanon loves you...do know what I would do to hear that from him now?...don't let him slip away Miku cause he won't wait around forever." With that Toshiya headed to the door. Hopefully he'd be able to talk some sense into the actor that his love's heart. The bassist truly wished he could have another chance with Kanon...it wouldn't happen. At least he could try to make him happy.

When Toshiya left, Miku found himself sitting at his counter mulling over the words that had been said. Did Kanon really not mind everything? His sushi bar was suffering business wise because of this though. But there were always ways around that, they could move and always take the sushi bar to another place...

He found himself getting up and slipping into his shoes. Kanon would be home from work by now, he'd be sinking into his couch, turning on the tv, and watching whatever was on. The only thing missing from that equation was him trying to distract him from the tv... It was just a quick walk across the street to get to his apartment, it was just going to convince Kanon that he was an idiot and that he was sorry that promised to be the hard part.

When he was finally in front of Kanon's door he hesitated, what if Kanon wanted nothing to do with him anymore? Toshiya said he still had a chance, but Kanon had the final say in that... He wouldn't know if he didn't knock, which he did softly but with some urgency.

Kanon was laying on his couch with his head in Shinya's lap. "I can't believe he did that...why didn't you tell me?"

"Because you would have disagreed with it. Toshiya adores you Kanon. He'd do anything to see you happy." Shinya was trying to make him feel better. It wasn't really working. There was a knock at the door and there on the other side was Miku...figures. Toshiya had talked to him. He wasn't coming back of his own accord.

"Wow...what is it you could want with me?" Kanon sounded bitter and he knew it. It didn't matter though. Miku wasn't here because he wanted to be. Toshiya had gotten him to come. That was almost as bad as him not coming at all.

"Okay, I deserve that..." Miku looked down at his feet, trying to find what he wanted to say. He had it right there and then his tone... Well it threw his entire speech down the drain. He looked back up to Kanon though and put a hand on his shoulder, "Look... I know sorry wont cover it, but I only did what I did because I thought it would help you. They were following every little thing you did Kanon! Not going around you and changing my schedule and patterns looked like the only way to get them to leave you alone.

"I never called to end it because I didn't want to end it! I was trying to fix things, which I didn't do in the most graceful of ways..." The blode rubbed the back of his, this wasn't working well at all, and felt a lot like the ending of the movie that had started his career, "I want to say I'm sorry... I know I have no right to even expect anything less than a door in my face. Just... know that I'm not just here because some guy told me this should be how it be, or this is what I should do. There is no right way to make up for what I've done, but this is the best place to start, I think..." He felt like he was digging an even deeper hole the more he spoke...

"Well just in case you didn't know, ignoring and not calling not to mention making certain you never had to see me kind of says 'I'm dumping you'. Regardless if you wanted to be here you would've been here by now. I took a hit to my business, had my face all over the tabloids, and had paparazzi stalk me for weeks just to find out the person I was putting up with it for didn't want anything to do with me. It was real nice. I should have seen it coming. It happened with Toshiya too, at least he had the decency to call me to tell me it was over. All I got from you were excuses. I'm sorry but I'm busy right now. I don't have time for you. Doesn't feel very good does it?" With that Kanon went back inside and closed the door. He came back to Shinya's arms and curled up.

"Why did you do that? You love him Shin..."

"But he doesn't love me. If he did he wouldn't have done this to me...just forget it. It was over between us when he stopped taking my calls and switched sushi restaurants." His heart was breaking but Kanon wasn't going to be some hopeless guy that just went back to someone after all that. He refused to be...even if all he wanted to do was kiss Miku and take him back.

Miku definitely wasn't expecting that... the door in the face, yes, but the heart crushing rejection? No... His head hung for a moment and his squeezed his eyes tightly, preventing any tears from falling at that moment. He wanted to get home before he let himself crumble. He almost made it too, but started to lose it once he stepped from the elavator and reached his door. It felt like it took forever to get his door unlocked, probably because he was holding his breath until he got inside and slammed the door. His cry echoed into his apartment as he slid down the door, sobbing into his knees. Molly was there in a heartbeat, trying desperately to see her owner's face to see what was wrong with him. The blonde simply scooped her up was drug himself to his room.

Weeks passed since he'd talk to Kanon, he tried his best just to keep it together and not even bother Kanon... He did go by his sushi bar every once in a while, he was happy to see business was picking back up and that Yuuki was in there helping Kanon to smile... Though he wished it was him in there, joking with them and just enjoying life. Just go back to how things were before. It'd never happen though, Kanon made that clear, so with a sigh he started walking again. Time to go back to his apartment, a little drinking and guitar playing on the roof sounded pretty good... So he went up to the roof, a case of alcohol and guitar in hand and with no thought to even lock his apartment up.

Back in the sushi bar with Yuuki though, he was trying to convince Kanon to go and actually see Vertigo with him and a bunch of his friends, "Come on~ You didn't go with me to the premiere, you could at least go noooooow~ Come on, please? I'll pay for everything and even buy you something!" The man had started to get over his crush on Kanon, but now he wanted to help Kanon either move on and make up with Miku. He figured Vertigo would be the best way to do that, seeing the similarity may spark something in Kanon.

When Kanon, although begrudging, agreed, he nearly jumped for joy. It was the first step of recovery for his friend, now if only Miku were so simple... Kanon was probably the only cure for him though, even if it was just a simple 'Lets just be friends.' Not being around Kanon at all was killing him slowly. So when they finally made it to the theater and were close to the end of the movie, he started watching Kanon's reaction from the corner of his eye.

Soshi had a gentle grip on Ayaka's wrist, "Ayaka... Waking up every morning next to you, holding you, making your dreams come true... You are what I want in life, I'll do anything to prove that to you." The look on his face was so intense and sincere... Ayaka, fighting tears, turned back to look at him, watching as he let go of her wrist. "I want nothing more than that... But I need some time, please?"

"Ayaka--!" The woman closed the distance between them, kissing him passionately then hugging herself close. Soshi clung to her as if his life depended on it... "I love you..." He murmered against her head. "I love you too." Reluctantly he let her go and watched her walk away...

"That was the last time... Ayaka and I would see each other..."

Miku's voice rung out so clearly through the theater, after that blinding white moment, tire screeches and sirens were heard. Ayaka's phone went off, Soshi's name coming up on the caller ID, but on the other end was Yuuki's character, Takado, telling her he had been killed... The movie ended with Ayaka standing by Soshi's grave with a little boy holding her hand...

Kanon agreed to go though he knew it would be hard. Seeing Miku was always hard now. He couldn't help himself from seeing him when the man came and went to his apartment. But he went for Yuuki's sake. Now he just had to make it through the movie. He did too...until the end. Seeing the ending...seeing Miku die in the movie. It made him start crying. If Miku ever did die...really? Kanon didn't know if he could get over that. Once out of the theater he got up the nerve to call him. For some reason he had to know the blone was alright. Something in his gut told him to call.

"Come on Miku...pick up..."

Miku's phone was sitting next to him and a few empty alcohol bottles on the roof, but was still on silent since the night Kanon officially ended it. Most of the music on his phone reminded him of his ex, and he wasnt inspired enough to really look for more. Instead, Kanon got his answering service, "Hi, Miku here, I can't get to my phone right now so leave a message. Or if it's really important, you know where to find me."

Unfortunately, Miku's roof visiting habits were a new thing. And with how he felt tonight, he doubted very much he would be going home tonight.

Kanon left a voice mail urging Miku to call him back. He had a bad feeling and wanted to know the other was okeh. It wasn't good enough though just to hear his voice mail. He needed to see for himself that Miku was alright. So Kanon bid everyone a goodnight and left to go to Miku's apartment. He knocked on his door several times before he decided to risk it and just go in...it was unlocked too. Huh...but the blonde wasn't there. That sparked fear in Kanon. He didn't know what to do...this wasn't good.

"Miku...come on. Where are you?" Once more the chef tried his phone hoping that he'd pick up or something. Anything that would tell him where he was."[/i]

Miku was sittin another bottle down when he saw his phone was going off, he didn't even look at the name, he just answered.

"Hello...?" His voice was soft, he waited for what seemed like forever for the person to speak... "Heh, alright Yuuki... We've played this game one too many times now. I'm on the roof, the view is amazing..." His voice was still soft, and he only had a tiny hint of slur in his speech. Without saying anything more, he hung up and started playing a sad tune on his guitar. Sad was all he could manage since Kanon was gone from his life.

Kanon heard his voice but couldn't seem to say hello. Miku was so...soft spoken. He was on the roof? With a bit of a slur...uh oh. Once he hung up the chef headed to the roof. There was Miku...with empty bottles of alcohol and a guitar. He was really close to the edge of the roof too...

"Miku...? I-I wanted to see you. I had a feeling that something bad was going to happen and I...I wanted to make sure you were alright." Kanon could feel his throat closing up and his voice getting hoarse. There wasn't more he could do...he wanted the man back. He ached for him even. His heart swelled at seeing him but broke at knowing how things had ended. How had things gotten so messed up?

Miku stopped playing when he heard someone other than Yuuki... "Kanon...?" He turned his head to look at the other, "Oh... I'm alright. See?" He pat himself down as he stood, although it was a bit wobbly and he had to steady himself with his guitar...

It hurt so much to see him, to not be able to touch him... He started tear up as he turned back around. "You know... I thought that I had a good grasp on how Soshi felt in the movie... But my acting is a joke compared to the real thing. Living with this kind of pain is almost unbareable, but I donmt even have a chance." Miku let go of his guitar, watching it fall into the alley bellow.

"It would be so easy..." He kicked a beer bottle off the side as well, "but not worth your pain... Excuse me..." He stumbled by Kanon, the thought of suicide had been there, but seeing Kanon and hearing him talk made him change his mind...

Kanon caught Miku's arm and pulled him back to hold him close. "Miku my pain can't get any worse then it is...I'm sorry for how I acted but I was hurt and heartbroken. I never even got a chance to tell you that I loved you before all that shit happened. It was like realizing you're in love and then that person just vanishing from your existence. It...it hurt. I wanted you back when you came over but I knew you didn't love me. You wouldn't have...you wouldn't have needed Toshiya's talk to come see me. This isn't you. You aren't this guy Miku...don't become him." He didn't know what he what else he could do short of just giving in and being the guy he swore he wouldn't be. But he wanted Miku so bad...he needed him almost. Something in his body just...sang when he was near him.

"Miku...stop this..."

Miku stumbled a bit more when Kanon grabbed him, the hug caught him off guard, but what he said slightly angered him. Still he found himself holding onto him, "Believe me, it can. It gets worse when someone tells you, you don't love them. I didn't need Toshiya to tell me to go see you. For god's sake I knew what I needed to do, it was convincing myself to do it that was the problem! To see that there were other ways around the damn tabloids and paparazzi." The blonde pushed Kanon back, his hands were still on his shoulder though and he stared into his eyes, heaven did he still look so beautiful...

"What do you want me to stop Kanon? What else is there for me to stop?! Caring? Breathing? What?!" He was getting angry... He didn't want to be yelling at him... "Forget I said anything... I'm sorry, I shouldn't have yelled..." He let go of him and stepped back towards the door the lead back downstairs, "I don't know what you want me to do or say... But I do know I shouldn't do any of it while I'm half drunk..." He walked through the door and down to his apartment, he made it about to the bottom of the stairs before collapsing to his knees, he tried holding back his sobs but they still managed to sneak out occasionally.

"Miku..." Kanon didn't know what to do. He had to do something. The man went and got a dozen roses and sent them to Miku's agent. If he still wanted him then this would show it. He sent the roses with a note.

'If you still want me and if I have any chance of getting you back come by my house. I will be waiting at 8.'

Kanon had everything set up. Fine wine, lovely dinner of Miku's favorite foods, and soft music. He was dressed as pleasing as he could be and all the man could hope for was that Miku showed up.

Miku got the flowers and the note, he thought about ignoring it... but he wanted Kanon back in his life, he didn't feel as complete without him. So when he went home that evening, he set out to make himself look as good as possible. But then again he didn't want to overdo it... So he settled for a pair of nice skinny jeans and a simple black button up. He slipped into his shoes and started walking over to Kanon's apartment. He made a quick glance at his watch before knocking, he'd made it at 8 o'clock on the nose.

When Kanon opened the door he offered a small smile, "Evening, I made it." He was still smiling softly as he walked in, the lighting in the house was all candle light... He wondered what Kanon was planning... "Kanon... if this is an apology you don't have to... I'm the one who should still be apologizing..."

Kanon smiled when he opened the door and allowed Miku in. "I should apologize for how I acted. I was hurt and swore to myself that I wouldn't be the guy who just caved and went back to someone even if that was what I wanted to do...I should have given you a chance...come, sit. I made dinner...that's if you still like my cooking." Though he didn't say it, Kanon really was hurt by Miku's switch of restaurants. He didn't like knowing Miku would go to another sushi chef for his food.

"White or red wine?" There was music playing softly in the background. Kanon was really trying hard to make Miku want him again. He worried that it might have been too late for that chance...

"I love your cooking, believe me when I say I and several others were sorely missing your sushi bar..." The blonde moved towards the table and pondered his wine choice, "White wine sounds good..." He watched closely as Kanon poured the wine and placed them at the table, before Kanon had the chance to pull his chair out, Miku was on it and working his charm. He then moved back to his chair, he found he couldn't stop smiling at him, "You know... You're really pretty in the candle light?"

"I'm glad you missed it. At least I know you like mine better." The man smiled and went to get the wine, grinning at the man as he pulled the chair out. Kanon was blushing at the sight of Miku. He was still so beautiful.

"Thank you...you look amazing in any light. You are beautiful. Very very beautiful...I've missed you. More then I have anyone, which is saying something considering Toshi." The chef blushed and looked down. It probably wasn't the best thing to bring up his ex like that.

"So what have you been up to? Anymore movies you working on?"

"I've missed you too... More than I can ever say." Miku put his hand on Kanon's free one, squeezing it slightly before releasing it.

"None yet, my agent just gave me a list of things when he delivered the flowers you sent... I'll look at them a little later though. I have some more important things to handle right now though." He sipped on his wine and sampled some of the foods Kanon had made, god it was as good as he remembered. "Mm... And how about you? I saw your business has picked up again."

That in itself was something he was really grateful for, if he could have fixed anything it would have definitely been Kanon's business, that was what made him happiest without fail.

"It did. Most of my new customers are the tmz watchers and magazine readers. They wanted to try the food that 'Made Hollywood's it boys fall in love.' Like I was nothing and you and Yuuki only liked me for my food...for awhile I actually believed it. Then Yuuki told me he would've asked me out if I was a fast food joint order taker...he also said you probably would've asked me out no matter what I did. That it just so happened I made good food." Kanon gratefully took Miku's hand and held it. He couldn't express how nervous he was. Miku made butterflies move erratically around his gut.

That made Miku chuckle, "You could be a hobo and I would still want you." He brought his hand up to his lips and kissed it. He could see Kanon was nervous, hell he was too, he didn't want to screw up...

"Come on, up with you." Miku pulled him up and much like the first night they'd kissed, he started to dance with him. "We wont get anywhere if we're both nervous..." He held him close, resting his head on his shoulder as he did, "What better way than to a nice slow song, hm?"