Lights, Camera, Sushi!

A shudder ran through him as Kanon pushed into him. He clung to the man, his breathing was labored as he tried to adjust to him. He was nervous, but he didn't want to stop now... Not when he could feel he was so close to getting a grasp on his life again.

As Kanon's pace picked up, so did his moans. When the other said he loved him, he couldn't help to pull him into a kiss and rock his hips to match his thrust, "I love you too... Non-chii..." A pet name he used when he wanted to rile Kanon up more and make him go a little harder. Little by little Miku felt himself coming back, he just hopped Kanon could tell too with how he was starting to act.

Kanon groaned when Miku used his pet name. He moved to hold onto the man as he thrusted harder into him. His body reacted quite noticeably to the name. It registered that only the Miku that remembered would know that name but he was lost in the pleasure of his boyfriend. He grabbed hold of Miku and pulled him closer, angling to a spot he knew he'd enjoy. Once it was found he didn't let up from the spot. Kanon could feel he was close and nibbled on Miku's neck as he tried to stop himself from being so lost in the moment.

Miku nearly screamed when Kanon hit his prostrate. Everything he was doing put him on the edge and made him want more... But his body couldn't handle anymore of such an addicting feeling. His abdomen burned as he felt his walls start to clench around Kanon's thrusting member. He moaned his lover's name and clung to him as he rode out his orgasm.

"W-wow... That was... wow..." Miku leaned up to kiss Kanon, he was still hungry for his touch, but was too tired to do any more... "Kanon... I love you. From the bottom of my heart, I. Love. You." He kissed him between each word. His memories were back for the most part, and he was certain Kanon could tell...

"The only thing that's hazy... is that night. It just... felt like a bad dream..."

Kanon smiled and kissed Miku back. "I love you too...very much." The man pulled out and covered them up in the blankets. He held onto Miku, never wanting to let go.

"I'm glad I could unlock most of your memories...and that was a horrible nightmare. I hope you never remember it. I could have just died watching you get hurt...I can only imagine the pain I'd feel if I saw you in the position I was. I probably would have killed that man. No one hurts you and gets away with it." Kanon kissed Miku's head and shifted so they were as close as they could possibly be without going another round.

"At least I know you weren't lying when you said I was your biggest trigger."

Miku smiled and held onto his lover as the cuddled... "How many days have gone by in total...? To be honest, a lot of things recently have felt like it's gone by in a haze..." Though he should have remembered the last few days since being released from the hospital, it was really hard. It was probably because he was still suffering some head trauma, but he could only keep getting better right?

"I could never completely forget you Shin... you're far too important to me for just a little blow to the head to do me in." He suddenly remembered the ring in his coat pocket and wondered if it was still there or if it had been lost. Or maybe if Kanon had stumbled across it, he foggily remembered seeing it recently... So maybe.

"I'm glad you're here... Waking up alone would have been bad..."

"About a month has gone by...Dai wants to have a cookout for my birthday party since we weren't awake for it to happen." Kanon watched Miku closely. How could he remember everything now but not when he didn't have it. That made very little sense, even though he knew it was prone to happen.

"They'll be happy to know you've got your memory back...Yuuki's gonna know immediately I did the one thing I swore I wasn't going to do..." Even if it had in the end done what they'd been trying to do all day, Kanon had still sworn he wouldn't do something like that with Miku while he didn't have his memories. But then again he had given him permission and he was dating Miku so maybe it was wrong for him to swear that he wouldn't.

"I'm glad you're back...I was afraid I'd lost you forever."

Miku smiled, "I'm glad to be back..." Miku cuddled close to Kanon and let himself fall asleep. He was so tired and his head was starting to throb lightly. Sleep was best for now...

He had a dreamless sleep. When he woke up, he sat up slowly, looking around the room and down at his own naked body... Then he looked over to Kanon who was still asleep next to him, also naked... He stood carefully, walking slowly to the bathroom... He needed a shower, he couldn't remember the last time he'd had one but he felt he needed one. He stepped into the shower and turned it on, washing himself thoroughly and just soaking in the heat.

When finished and dried off, he slipped into some clean sleeping pants, walking back into the room with Kanon... As he looked at the man, he had only one thought; Why couldn't he remember last night?

Kanon woke up to an empty bed, again. Curiously he looked around and found Miku staring at him. "Hey...what are you doing up so early? Come back to bed..." The man held out his arms but as he did he finally read the look on the man's face. Confusion.

"What's wrong? It's just me...Miku?" His heart clenched when he realized that his boyfriend might have relapsed. If he had and he didn't remember...Kanon could feel the tears start to threaten his eyes but he didn't dare let them fall.

"Y-you remember me still...don't you?"

Miku had his own tears forming, he blinked multiple times and looked down... How could he explain this? None of it made sense... When he finally managed to look up, he could see the tears ready to fall in Kanon's eyes, "I remember you... but... I don't remember last night..."

He stood and moved back closer to Kanon, he took his hand and curled up close to him, "What's happening to me Kanon...?" The blonde was scared... He remembered Kanon a lot more now, some things were still missing, but more importantly he was missing last night... "How long have I been like this?" A question very similar to last night, a question he didn't remember asking...

Kanon held Miku for dear life. He was afraid the other was slowly slipping away. "It hasn't been long but...I'm sorry. I shouldn't have but you were willing and I thought maybe-it worked but then...come on. Let me get showered and dressed and we'll go to the doctor. I don't think he'd appreciate me smelling like sex, especially when he told us no strenuous activity..." The chef was babbling but he didn't know what to do. Miku remembered him but then forgot him again. Well, most of him. At least he still knew who he was this time.

"Here, call Yuuki. His number's programed into the phone. Tell I need him over here. I'll only be 5 minutes Miku. Don't go anywhere."

Miku did as Kanon instructed, he sat on the edge of the bed and scrolled to Yuuki's name and hit the call button. It rang two times before Yuuki answered, "Kanon needs you to come over..."

"Miku? Is everything alright?" Miku shook his head even though Yuuki couldn't see it, "I don't know... I need to go back to the doctor..." "Don't say another word, I'll be there." And then he hung up. It left Miku sitting there to think about a whole lot of nothing... If he was going back to the doctor he'd need to get dressed. And so he did, he also laid out clothing for Kanon.

He found himself standing by the window in their room and staring outside... It was so gloomy out, it fit the mood he guessed. When Kanon came back in he spoke up, "I'm sorry Kanon... I-I don't know what else to say..." He hated he was doing this to the other. He felt like he was giving Kanon a lot of unnecessary grief. If he was slipping away... should he cut all ties with Kanon? Tell him to move on for someone who would remember him in the morning?

Kanon took Miku to the hospital with Yuuki but the news wasn't good. Miku suffered from short term memory loss and couldn't hold onto things long enough to transfer to long term memory...not to mention the fact his amnesia wasn't allowing him to have long term memory either. In truth it was highly likely he'd just forget everyone eventually. The best bet for Miku's safety and peace of mind was to just put him in a ward so he wouldn't hurt himself or anyone else if it did come to pass that he didn't remember anything.

"But...but Miku. Doctor he's everything to me."

"Then I suggest you find a way to move on. I'm sorry Sano-san. This is for the best." Kanon was crushed completely by the news and loss of Miku. He did try to move on and even decided to go back out with Toshiya again, even though he still dreamed of Miku every night. It had been a year and things had gone back to normal for the most part but anyone that knew him well could see the loss of Miku still in his eyes.

"A year...a full year...I can't believe it."

When Miku was first taken away, he didn't understand. He was angry, hurt, betrayed, bitter... But eventually those feelings slipped away from him. Kanon never came around, Yuuki came all the time but never mentioned Kanon. He did tell him about how successful his last movie had been, how when he was finally out from the ward he'd have plenty of acting roles just waiting for him. Miku was grateful for Yuuki, Yuuki was always there to help him with memory exorcises... He was his best friend still.

As the year rolled by, his memory became better and better. He could remember things that happened days before and could even recall things that had happened before coming to the ward. A week to the year, when Yuuki came in, instead of their usual friendly greeting, Miku had a question... "Where's Kanon?"

Yuuki at first didn't know if he should tell him, it wasn't pretty... "What do you remember?"

"I bought a ring for him, but that night someone broke in and tried to kill him... He's not... Yuuki?"

"No, he's alive. Sit down..." Yuuki told him everything, from them being in the hospital, getting out and coming home, to him being put into this ward for his own safety... Miku couldn't believe his ears... "A year and a month...? I can't believe it... But that still doesn't tell me where Kanon is." The man sighed and put a hand on his shoulder, "He's... moved on. The doctor said it would be best if we all did... But I couldn't do that, frankly I'm surprised Kanon did. Things haven't been the same between him and anyone though... He's still hurting in his own ways..."

Miku was shocked... even a few weeks later when he was released he was still shocked. Yuuki was the one who took him home and sat with him as he let the emotions wash over him. Kanon was gone. He couldn't just expect him to wait forever but... well... a part of him somewhere must have always hoped. "Yuuki... Don't say anything to Kanon. Okay? I... I think I'm just going to sell the place and move... there's too many memories. I need a fresh start."

"Come on Kanon, you have to get out sometime. You have to do something other then run this restaurant and then going home for the night...come on. Please?" Despite being back with Toshiya, Kanon couldn't get past Miku. He loved him too much to truly let go. He wondered how his boyfriend...ex-boyfriend was doing. Did he completely forget him? Was he remembering him? God if he could just see the man then maybe he could finally let go...

"Sorry Toshi...I just don't feel up to it." His boyfriend sighed but let the matter drop. Shrugging to Dai, he left. What else could he do? Dai however wanted to make sure Toshiya was okeh...but he ran across something disturbing before that. Kanon and Miku's house was for sell. Curiosity got the better of him and went to inquire about the house.

"Hello? I wanted to know how much the house was going to sell-Miku!? Wha-what? But you were...and then-what? Do you have your memories back? I mean, if you do then Kanon should know..." There in front of the guitarist was Kanon's ex, Miku was out of the ward he was put in and no one knew. Did Yuuki even know? He was with Kanon at the restaurant right then. Surly he knew...

There was a knock at the door, when he opened it Dai was the last person he expected to see. "Hello to you too Dai... Please, come inside." Miku spoke softly and allowed Dai in, they moved to the kitchen where Miku offered him some tea.

"I take it you're not really interested in the house are you?" The look on Dai's face said it all... "Yes. I have my memories back... Except for the short time before I was put back into the ward."

"That's great! I can't wait to tell--"

"Dai. You can't. Yuuki already knows, but I can't do that to Kanon though... Not when I haven't been here for a year and a half, I put him through hell... I know that without even remembering, just because I know Kanon." The idea of never seeing Kanon again hurt... He wanted him so badly, but he couldn't risk hurting him again.

Dai didn't understand...why wouldn't he want Kanon to know? "But he loves you. He would want to know. He'd be overjoyed Miku...believe me, nothing compares to what he's like now without you. You haven't seen him...please, you gotta tell him. He has a right to know." The red head wondered if anyone was going to tell Kanon that the love of his life not only remembered him but was refuses to even see him. The thought of him finding out on his own wasn't one that set well with Dai.

"Give him a chance. He'd take you back in an instant. That guy loves you more then I love Shinya and I've loved that man since I was 13."

"And what if I relapse again Dai? What then? I want to see him, every fiber of my being is screaming to go to him and steal him back from Toshiya. But I can't do something like that to him when there's still a good chance that I could forget him again. How many times do you think Kanon could take losing me without it finally killing him, Dai?" It shined in Miku's eyes that he was torn about doing this... But he had to do something.

"I have to at least move from here... I can't handle the memories. If anyone is going to tell him though, it should be me... But I'm not certain he'd handle anything me related well..." Miku was in pain, he wanted Kanon back so badly, but at the same time almost felt like he needed to let him go... He didn't want to drag him down.

"Fine, do what you think is best but if this gets back to him and he finds out that you're out and have your memories and didn't come find him? I don't want to be around when it happens. It's the losing you forever that scared him to death but I guess that's already happened so what more damage could you possibly do? Whatever. Do what you think is best Miku but know that if you walked into that restaurant right now he'd take you back without a second thought. Toshiya knows it too and he wouldn't have a choice but to accept it. Good luck Miku...I really hope you're doing the right thing." With that Dai left. He didn't what to do with the information but he knew telling Kanon would kill him. Miku was a bleeding wound that no one thought would ever heal.

In the end... Miku couldn't sell the house. He had a few offers, but decided to just close it down for now and still move. He moved back into town but a safe distance away from Kanon and his work. Thoughts of busting into Kanon's restaurant crossed his mind everyday, he'd even make it half way there before he or Yuuki would stop him... He just didn't know how to go about doing it.

When he finally got an offer as a supporting roll though, he knew he needed to do something before his name really got out there. Yumi, the actress he'd worked with during Vertigo, offered to come with him. She'd been growing close to him throughout her entire time knowing him. She was the one who had helped him move into his newest home after finally convincing him to move closer rather than farther away.

"Mi-kun... Are you sure this is what you want babe? I mean... you're doing so well!" The woman linked her arm with Miku's as they walked through the park. Miku didn't respond... he just sighed and looked down, this just made Yumi sigh in return, but she gave him a kiss on the cheek. "Maybe you should move on as well? A warm body next to you may help you cope hun~"

Kanon still didn't know about Miku's memory recovery or the fact that everyone he knew knew about it. It was why Toshiya decided to save himself the pain and grief of Kanon dumping him for Miku and just ended things. They remained good friends though. Still, he knew he had to get out of his apartment sometime and Yuuki was the one to finally convince him to do it. Molly needed to get out and have some fresh air and apparently so did he. That's what led them to the park on the beautiful day. Molly wasn't in the mood for a nice walk though and jerked away from Kanon.

"Dammit. Molly! Molly get back here! Molly!!!" Kanon was about to catch up to the dog when he saw who she'd ran to. His entire world stopped when he saw Miku. Then his heart clenched and shattered. The girl he was with was his costar from Vertigo...and she'd kissed him. Yuuki was only a few paces behind him but skidded to a stop in front of Miku too.

"Fuck." Kanon ignored him though. His eyes refused to move off of Miku. When the hell did he get out of the ward? Did he remember him? Did he even want to? The recognition was there...Miku definitely knew who he was. So why hadn't he come seen him? If his old costar knew he was out and was hanging with him why the hell didn't he know? And why wasn't Yuuki as shocked as he was?

"You knew!!? You knew he was out didn't you!?" The man finally moved away from Miku and rounded on Yuuki. His best friend knew that the man he loved more then air was out of his ward and remembered him and he didn't even bother telling him!?

Molly? He stopped when he heard the voice, his stomach dropped even further when he saw his old pet and the man chasing after her... Oh no. Yumi didn't understand at first, fearing perhaps that he'd relapsed suddenly, but then she saw what Miku was staring at as well. It seemed like forever that they just had a stare down, but then Kanon rounded on Yuuki.

Miku let go of Yumi and grabbed Kanon securely, there was no way Kanon would be able to wriggle away from him. "Kanon. Kanon stop!" Yuuki had backed away with Yumi and held Molly at bay, he feared that Kanon could go ballistic on any of them at the moment. He was almost certain now that Kanon was going to figure out that everyone but him knew...

"It's not Yuuki's fault! So quit trying to kill him!" He needed to let Kanon know it was a mix of his own choice and a doctor's recommendation...

"No it's yours! You should have come and seen me! Why not? Do you know what the last year has been like for me? Complete hell! I've felt dead inside from losing you Miku and what are you doing? Outside in the world having all your memories and yet leaving me in the dark? Why!? Did you not want me anymore cause it would have been easier if you'd just come up to me and told me to my face. I can't believe Yuuki knew...Toshi knew! That's why he dumped me! He told me there was something in front of my damn face that I wasn't seeing and he wasn't going to stay only to get hurt in the end. You told Toshiya but not me. What the hell Miku do I mean that little to you?" Kanon was crying but they were no longer tears of sorrow. He was furious. All he could think about was the fact that everyone around him had been dropping hints. Everyone he knew...knew. Yet no one on the planet bothered to tell him?

"Everyone else got to know you remembered but me? I see...well, thanks for that. Go enjoy your new found life with your girlfriend. Keep Molly too, she was happier with you anyway. I'm sure her you'll be wanting back. And Yuuki...don't you dare come near me. You should have told me." Kanon jerked out of Miku's gripped and walked away. He couldn't believe this was happening. How could all the people that claimed to have loved him the most kept the one he loved the most a secret from him? He didn't understand how they could do something like that to him.

Kanon jerked away from him, but he wasn't going to let him go that easily. He needed to at least know why he didn't come to see him. When he finally caught up to him he grabbed his wrist and spun him around, "Just listen to me. You can hate me all you want, you and everyone else can for that matter. Their not telling you was my doing, all me. I didn't come to you because when I finally remembered you had finally moved on, and nobody told me any different. Just that if I did go to see you, you'd come back to me. I couldn't do that though... Kanon, theres always going to be a chance I'll relapse and be back in that ward! I can't keep doing that to you!"

Miku wished there was an easier way to make him understand... but he knew that that would be impossible. He loved Kanon, even now, but there would never be a fixing this...

"Are you kidding? I wanted you! I love you Miku whether you remember me or not. I cried for months after you went into that damn ward. I wanted to see but the doctor said it would only hurt you because of the relationship we'd had and you couldn't remember it. I wanted nothing more then you. Toshiya even knew that when we started dating again. He could hear me almost every night calling out for you. He knew where my heart was. I may have started dating someone else Akiharu but I never moved on nor did I ever stop wanting you. You were everything to me...didn't you know that?" Kanon's anger was starting to dissipate but he could see Yuuki and their old costar standing there. Even if he had never truly moved on...Miku had.

"I would have jumped at the chance of having you back, even if you ended up losing your memories the next day. Being with you for any amount of time was more then worth the pain when you weren't there...I would've taken the risk. But, doesn't really matter anymore does it? You've moved on so I guess I should finally put you behind me too huh?" Kanon left them in the park. He'd had enough. This had to be some sick joke...had to be some nightmare...had to...

Miku felt lower than dirt with each word Kanon spoke... He knew it was all true, but he just couldn't seem to bring himself to accept it... Even if he did now, what could he do?

Yumi was by his side in and instant, along with Yuuki, "I'm sorry Yuuki... I really screwed up..."

"You did what you thought was right... But I could have told you more about Kanon..."

"Mi-chii... There's always time to repair things... Unless you want to move on?"

Miku shook his head, "I don't think I can fix this one... Maybe it is time to move on..."